Struggling

Good Morning Brothers…

“This is stupid”, I thought to myself. I have been walking around in the tall grass for close to an hour, with flashlights in both hands and a headlamp on my head.

Searching…

My arrow was stuck in the ground, downward angle, coated in red, I knew I had a dead deer out here somewhere. Here’s the thing…no blood trail. The trail went cold about 12 inches from the arrow.

12 INCHES…!!!

Not much to track. I had replayed the shot in my mind, replayed his movement after the shot, and was pretty sure he was lying in this field of tall native prairie grass somewhere. But without a blood trail, the chances of finding him in the dark, started to favor the coyotes I could hear singing around me. My phone rang and it was my hunting partner who was at home, 50 minutes away. He asked, “Find that deer yet?”  I responded with, “Nope…still can’t find a trail. I’m walking around like Hansel and Gretel hoping to see antlers sticking up.”  “Do you need help?”, he asked.  I hesitated, and then answered, “Yes…I’m struggling.”  He didn’t pause at all, and responded with these words, “On my way.”

Don’t you wish our prayer life worked like this?

“Lord…I’m struggling.”    “On my way.”

Colossians 1:9-12 says, For this reason also, since the day we heard of it, we have not ceased to pray for you and to ask that you may be filled with the knowledge of His will in all spiritual wisdom and understanding, so that you will walk in a manner worthy of the Lord, to please Him in all respects, bearing fruit in every good work and increasing in the knowledge of God; strengthened with all power, according to His glorious might, for the attaining of all steadfastness and patience; joyously giving thanks to the Father, who has qualified us to share in the inheritance of the saints in Light.

We know that the Lord isn’t “on His way” as much as the Lord is “already arrived”, however, this passage is very telling about the difference between God’s will (at times) and my will. “Lord, I’m struggling”…means that I am struggling with a particular thing, not with all things, just this thing. The examples that Scripture gives us about “how” God answers prayers and fills us with His grace seem way bigger than just the one struggle. The passage above is filled with “knowledge of His will in all spiritual wisdom and understanding“…which sounds awesome, but right now Lord, I’m just trying to find this deer in the tall grass.

-“Lord, I’m struggling”…strengthened with all power, according to His glorious might, for the attaining of all steadfastness and patience“…again Lord, that sounds awesome, but I just need to sell some work to keep the company afloat.

-“Lord, I’m struggling”…”joyously giving thanks to the Father, who has qualified us to share in the inheritance of the saints in Light.…wow, I appreciate that Lord, but I really just need some help deciding what to do with my daughter when she comes back from therapy.

The Lord responds to my whimpering about struggles:

“If your will were aligned with My will, you would see that your role as a church member is to, “to please Him(Me) in all respects“. In order to fulfill your calling, you must first, “be filled with the knowledge of His(My) will in all spiritual wisdom and understanding“. This will equip you to “walk in a manner worthy of the Lord“.  Once you have started moving forward, marching if you will, I will pour My grace into you, “according to His(My) glorious might”, so that you will be, “strengthened with all power”, “bearing fruit in every good work and increasing in the knowledge of God.  As you continue along this path of sanctification, you will realize more and more, that the storms of life will continue to come, however, your reaction to them will be with, “all steadfastness and patience; joyously giving thanks to the Father”. Because…I, the Lord, have “qualified you to share in the inheritance of the saints in Light.”

My response to the Lord:

“Lord in heaven, I want to be Your man. I want to fulfill every plan You have for me. Lord, I have prayed repeatedly this prayer, “Lord, I will do whatever it is You want me to do, just make it plain to me, because I’m an idiot, I may miss the signs.” Lord, I do feel Your peace, I do have Your joy, I do feel Your presence in my life…but I do not have a sense of direction for the decisions I need to make quickly. Although I am joyously giving thanks, although I recognize persecution and suffering are the inheritance of the saints, along with power and wisdom, I’m still struggling. I will walk Your path, but in the physical here and now, what is Your path? I feel like I am not pleasing You in all respects because my here and now remains hidden.”

Five minutes after hanging up the phone with my hunting partner, after he said, “On my way”…I found my deer. The first words out of my mouth were:

“Thank You Jesus”

 

 

Advertisements
This entry was posted in Uncategorized. Bookmark the permalink.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s